Welcome to Care Enough

                                           Author:  Kenneth F. Joe Sr.

There are no such thing as secrets when you evaluate the victims that are still coming forward disclosing the abuse at the hands of their priest.  People knew, so it wasn’t a secret.  Well again some will read this and say of course it is clear that bishops, priest and other church officials knew and covered it up.  The bishops, the priest and other clergy ultimately report to the people!  My mother’s eyes were closed as much as society’s eyes were closed at the possibility that priest could actually take advantage of their trusted status given to them by society.  Many people will read this and say, “I would have never let this or that happen.  I would have made better decisions for my child”.  Really?  What latitude do you give clergy now with children?  This type of abuse will continue in the church until “we” as a church demand that our church do the right thing concerning the protection and care of our children.  Every parish should have open scheduled dialogue to talk about the do’s and don’ts as related to anyone in the church caring for children on activities or working with children regularly in church groups.  Some communities will say, “we don’t have that problem”.  There is no use of addressing the issue when it has not affected us”.  That unfortunately is part of the problem that led to the years of “systematic secrecy” within the church.  How do you know you have not been affected?  I bet most parishes that have had to deal with this hurt as a congregation thought the same thing until their priest who they have grown up with and children have been baptized by was found to have sexually molested/raped children.  This is a call to everyone to wake up and expect the same standards we expect from teachers, doctors, lawyers, social workers and all who operate with a trust that must be given by the community.  I say trust with supervision.  We must end the blind trust that we have given to the church.  Even now our church struggles with focusing on the right response versus the liability of giving the right response.  If we care about children as I know we do as a people built on faith, we must ask and demand an understanding of how we want our children to be treated and cared for in our parishes.  We must be preventive and proactive by talking as a faith community of how we will enforce standards that protect our children.  We do not need directives from the bishop’s or the Pope in order to decide what should be done in our parishes.  Should those in ministries working with children undergo background checks?  Should their always be two adults when working with children?  These are only some questions that could be asked and decided by faith communities.  For those that say this is over the top, I hope the necessity for proactiveness is not triggered by someone you love being victim to this abuse.  I say we must all “care enough” to be involved in this solution.  We can all agree that our children deserve no less.

Impact of Child Sexual Abuse

  It is estimated that there are 60 million survivors of childhood sexual abuse in America today.
Source: Forward, 1993.

  Approximately 31% of women in prison state that they had been abused as children.
Source: United States Department of Justice, 1991.

  Approximately 95% of teenage prostitutes have been sexually abused.
Source: CCPCA, 1992.

  It is estimated that children with disabilities are 4 to 10 times more vulnerable to sexual abuse than their non-disabled peers.
Source: National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse, 1992.

  Long term effects of child abuse include fear, anxiety, depression, anger, hostility, inappropriate sexual behavior, poor self esteem, tendency toward substance abuse and difficulty with close relationships.
Source: Browne & Finkelhor, 1986.

  Clinical findings of adult victims of sexual abuse include problems in interpersonal relationships associated with an underlying mistrust. Generally, adult victims of incest have a severely strained relationship with their parents that is marked by feelings of mistrust, fear, ambivalence, hatred, and betrayal. These feelings may extend to all family members.
Source: Tsai and Wagner, 1978.

  Guilt is universally experienced by almost all victims. Courtois and Watts described the "sexual guilt" as "guilt derived from sexual pleasure"
Source: Tsai and Wagner, l978.

  Sexuality is regarded not simply as a part of the self limited to genitals, discrete behaviors, or biological aspects of reproduction, but is more properly understood as one component of the total personality that affects one's concept of personal identity and self-esteem.
Source: Whitlock & Gillman, 1989.

  Sexual victimization may profoundly interfere with and alter the development of attitudes toward self, sexuality, and trusting relationships during the critical early years of development.
Source: Tsai & Wagner, 1984.

  If the child victim does not resolve the trauma, sexuality may become an area of adult conflict.
Source: Courtois & Watts, 1982; Tsai & Wagner, 1984.

  There is the clinical assumption that children who feel compelled to keep sexual abuse a secret suffer greater psychic distress than victims who disclose the secret and receive assistance and support.
Source: Finkelhor & Browne, 1986.

  Early identification of sexual abuse victims appears to be crucial to the reduction of suffering of abused youth and to the establishment of support systems for assistance in pursuing appropriate psychological development and healthier adult functioning . As long as disclosure continues to be a problem for young victims, then fear, suffering, and psychological distress will, like the secret, remain with the victim.
Sources: Bagley, 1992; Bagley, 1991; Finkelhor et al. 1990; Whitlock & Gillman, 1989.

  Adolescents with a history of sexual abuse are significantly more likely than their counterparts to engage in sexual behavior that puts them at risk for HIV infection, according to Dr. Larry K. Brown and associates, from Rhode Island Hospital, in Providence.

  Adolescents with a history of sexual abuse are significantly more likely than their counterparts to engage in sexual behavior that puts them at risk for HIV infection, according to Dr. Larry K. Brown and associates, from Rhode Island Hospital, in Providence. Inconsistent condom use was three times more likely among youths who had been sexually abused than among the 55 who had not. A history of sexual abuse was also significantly associated with less impulse control and higher rates of sexually transmitted diseases. According to Dr. Brown, "These results suggest two things. Abused kids need adequate counseling around abuse issues. A lot of these kids keep re-experiencing the anxiety and trauma for years." The second issue, he said, is that "most therapy does not address current sexual behavior" and the anxieties that sexually abused adolescents experience.
Source: Larry K. Brown, M.D., et al, American Journal of Psychiatry 2000;157:1413-1415.

  Young girls who are forced to have sex are three times more likely to develop psychiatric disorders or abuse alcohol and drugs in adulthood, than girls who are not sexually abused. Sexual abuse was also more strongly linked with substance abuse than with psychiatric disorders. It was also suggested that sexual abuse may lead some girls to become sexually active at an earlier age and seek out older boyfriends who might, in turn, introduce them to drugs. Psychiatric disorders were from 2.6 to 3.3 times more common among women whose CSA included intercourse, and the risk of substance abuse was increased more than fourfold, according to the results. Family factors -- parental education, parenting behavior, family financial status, church attendance -- had little impact on the prevalence of psychiatric or substance abuse disorders among these women, the investigators observe. Similarly, parental psychopathology did not predict the association between CSA and later psychopathology.
Source: Kenneth S. Kendler, M.D., et al, Medical College of Virginia Commonwealth University, Archives of General Psychiatry 2000;57:953-959.

  Among both adolescent girls and boys, a history of sexual or physical abuse appears to increase the risk of disordered eating behaviors, such as self-induced vomiting or use of laxatives to avoid gaining weight. Among those at increased risk for disordered eating were respondents who had experienced sexual or physical abuse and those who gave low ratings to family communication, parental caring and parental expectations. In light of these findings, the researchers conclude that "strong familial relationships may decrease the risk for disordered eating among youth reporting abuse experiences."
Source: Dr. Dianne Neumark-Sztainer, et al, University of Minneapolis, International Journal of Eating Disorders 2000;28:249-258.

  Young girls who are sexually abused are more likely to develop eating disorders as adolescents. The findings also add to a growing body of research suggesting that trauma in childhood increases the risk of developing an eating disorder. Abused girls were more dissatisfied with their weight and more likely to diet and purge their food by vomiting or using laxatives and diuretics. Abused girls were also more likely to restrict their eating when they were bored or emotionally upset. Wonderlich suggests that abused girls might experience higher levels of emotional distress, possibly linked to their abuse, and have trouble coping. Food restriction and perhaps other eating disorder behaviors may (reflect) efforts to cope with such experiences. The report also indicates that while girls who were abused were less likely to exhibit perfectionist tendencies (such as making extreme efforts to avoid disappointing others and a need to be 'the best'), they tended to want thinner bodies than girls who had not been abused.
Source: Stephen A. Wonderlich, M.D., et al, University of North Dakota School of Medicine and Health Sciences in Fargo, Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 2000;391277-1283.